Melissa Dilan-Hernandez - None Of This Is My Fault

When viewing Melissa Dilan-Hernandez it is easy to see how she tends use passive aggressive behaviors to manipulate others. 

When confronted with behaviors that put her in a negative light she seeks to deflect attention away from the real issue because she fears direct confrontation about the real problem so she can assure herself that SHE is not at fault. 

When I attempted to communicate with her on TWITTER 30-year-old Melissa continually shifted the blame for the pregnancy and her inappropriate relationship with a young man who was 15-year-old as something that was beyond her control.

On the Dr. Phil show entitled “In Love & Illegal” Melissa whines that she doesn't think what she did was wrong and that she feels "attacked."

"I feel so much pressure. I am not a pedophile. I want people to know who I am. I'm not a bad person," she said.

Now the fame-whore has decided to release a statement on WikiBios as well as a new blog devoted exclusively to try to air the minutia of her  relationship with this boy in an attempt to discredit him. The problem is that DNA doesn't lie.  Her daughter was fathered by a minor and there's nothing that can change this. This means even if every word that falls from his mouth was a lie he's not lying about the act for which she was charged.

She was obviously very hurt when TJ placed an ad on Craig’s List looking for love.  It is also bothered her that he posted a NEW ad on Craig's List in January. 

Once again Melissa uses this to PROVE he’s a liar. She insists that he was only seventeen when he posted his first ad.  This was true but since he did turn eighteen within days of the post, I’m not certain that this makes such a difference.   

Then after some not too complimentary comments on You-Tube by a poster going by the name “nany-braun” Melissa deleted her comments from You-Tube and put out yet ANOTHER release.  I’m breathless as I try desperately to understand the mindset of this wanna-be reality TV star believes that what she has to say requires an official release. 

Let's face it.  The real victim in all of this is the child that was conceived by two people who lack the ability to make rational decision.  

Trial is set for Melissa Dilan-Hernandez on January 17, 2013.

Melissa Dilan-Hernandez A Fool For Love?

Shakespeare tells us that the course of true love never did run smooth and this is true of the star-crossed romance of Melissa Dilan-Hernandez and her "soul mate" TJ.

When last we met the couple the appeared on the Dr. Phil show were Melissa hoped to "set the record straight" and shore up the unlawful sex with certain minors case that she faces.

Melissa proclaimed that when she first met T.J. on Facebook two years ago, he told her that he was 18. She claims that they had an instant connection. “He told me that I was cute, and then I told him, ‘Send me a message,’” she explains.

Even after she learned T.J. actual age she decided to continue the relationship because they were already emotionally attached. As the adult in this case, it was her responsibility not only to say no to the sexual relationship. Even worse SHE decided to have a child but because she has an emotional need to justify her crime she proclaims that 'we' agreed to have a baby - as a minor.  I thought a woman is charge of her own body and therefore makes the final decision. 

“Some say that our love is wrong, but our personal belief is that it doesn’t really matter how old you are; love is love.”

Ah love, so fleeting, so temporal and this is true even for these star-crossed lovers. You see after the Dr. Phil show there was trouble in paradise. I suppose it is unfair to say that the trouble hadn't bubbled up to the surface before the show after all we learned that the police had been summoned to their motel room on seven separate occasions.

On the In Love and Legal show Melissa learned that TJ .was the one who actually went to the police station to fill out a report against Melissa. She also learned that he might not be so willing to wait fifteen years for her to serve out her sentence.

On Melissa's Twitter account she pondered

"How can someone kiss another in public a few hours after they tell you they love you? Do they feel any remorse? So sad."

It didn't take TJ long to move on which no doubt frustrated Melissa. I believe she was hoping that he was a willing victim in hopes that the courts would deal with her with leniency.

We learn the relationship is still volatile when she posts: "Ever been with someone that says he/she loves you, but lies constantly and when caught in it they turn aggressive?"

When others question her choice of dating a 15 1/2 year old boy Melissa's fall back response seems to be that Dr Phil edited the show to make her look bad. This was a charge she had even made while on the show but Dr. Phil let her know that if he really wanted to make her look bad he would share the other things he knew about her, pointed to the card, and she dropped it. On social networking sites though, she's free to spin her story as she pleases with little regard for the facts.

Melissa is quick to attack TJ's character as she insists that she wanted TJ to complete school but he never signed up to take the GED. Obviously Melissa is not knowledgeable about the drop-out statistics for young people who become parents in their teens. I find this interesting especially since she claims to have a BS degree in Education.

Melissa's fall-back seems to be in the role of damsel in distress as she tells a new young man she meets online that TJ dropped by destroying things, including her phone, threatening her by saying that if she didn't get back with him. She lets him know that she can't risk anymore domestic calls to the cops.

Meanwhile Melissa laments the fact that TJ is looking for love on Craigslist. She picks the ad apart bit by bit like a scorned lover. Could it be that she has lost her hold over him?

The sad part is that there are four children who are suffering in this whole drama. Melissa lost two of her children and isn't allowed to see them. Do you realize how difficult it is for a mother to lose custody?

When I tried speaking with Melissa for this article her tweets were more in line with personal attacks rather than substantive replies. She even asked her new potential suitor to attack not just me but others who questioned her wisdom in this situation.

Clearly Melissa exhibits many of the traits of a sociopath such as failing to recognize the rights of others, a grandiose sense of self, lacking the sense of personal boundaries, and is indifferent to the devastation she caused. She is not concerned about wrecking others' lives and dreams and she certainly does not accept any personal blame rather she blames others, even for acts she obviously committed.