Shakespeare tells us that the course of true
love never did run smooth and this is true of the star-crossed romance of Melissa
Dilan-Hernandez and her "soul mate" TJ.
When last we met the couple the appeared
on the Dr. Phil show were Melissa hoped to "set the record straight"
and shore up the unlawful sex with certain minors case that she faces.
Melissa proclaimed that when she first
met T.J. on Facebook two years ago, he told her that he was 18. She claims that
they had an instant connection. “He told me that I was cute, and then I told
him, ‘Send me a message,’” she explains.
Even after she learned T.J. actual age
she decided to continue the relationship because they were already emotionally
attached. As the adult in this case, it was her responsibility not only to say
no to the sexual relationship. Even worse SHE decided to have a child but
because she has an emotional need to justify her crime she proclaims that 'we'
agreed to have a baby - as a minor. I thought a woman is charge of her own body and therefore makes the final decision.
“Some say that our love is wrong, but
our personal belief is that it doesn’t really matter how old you are; love is
love.”
Ah love, so fleeting, so temporal and
this is true even for these star-crossed lovers. You see after the Dr. Phil
show there was trouble in paradise. I suppose it is unfair to say that the
trouble hadn't bubbled up to the surface before the show after all we learned
that the police had been summoned to their motel room on seven separate occasions.
On the In Love and Legal show Melissa
learned that TJ .was the one who actually went to the police station to fill
out a report against Melissa. She also learned that he might not be so willing
to wait fifteen years for her to serve out her sentence.
On Melissa's Twitter account she
pondered
"How can someone kiss another in
public a few hours after they tell you they love you? Do they feel any remorse?
So sad."
It didn't take TJ long to move on which
no doubt frustrated Melissa. I believe she was hoping that he was a willing
victim in hopes that the courts would deal with her with leniency.
We learn the relationship is still volatile
when she posts: "Ever been with someone that says he/she loves you, but
lies constantly and when caught in it they turn aggressive?"
When others question her choice of
dating a 15 1/2 year old boy Melissa's fall back response seems to be that Dr
Phil edited the show to make her look bad. This was a charge she had even made
while on the show but Dr. Phil let her know that if he really wanted to make
her look bad he would share the other things he knew about her, pointed to the
card, and she dropped it. On social networking sites though, she's free to spin
her story as she pleases with little regard for the facts.
Melissa is quick to attack TJ's
character as she insists that she wanted TJ to complete school but he never
signed up to take the GED. Obviously Melissa is not knowledgeable about the
drop-out statistics for young people who become parents in their teens. I find
this interesting especially since she claims to have a BS degree in Education.
Melissa's fall-back seems to be in the
role of damsel in distress as she tells a new young man she meets online that
TJ dropped by destroying things, including her phone, threatening her by saying
that if she didn't get back with him. She lets him know that she can't risk
anymore domestic calls to the cops.
Meanwhile Melissa laments the fact that
TJ is looking for love on Craigslist. She picks the ad apart bit by bit like a
scorned lover. Could it be that she has lost her hold over him?
The sad part is that there are four
children who are suffering in this whole drama. Melissa lost two of her
children and isn't allowed to see them. Do you realize how difficult it is for
a mother to lose custody?
When I tried speaking with Melissa for
this article her tweets were more in line with personal attacks rather than
substantive replies. She even asked her new potential suitor to attack not just
me but others who questioned her wisdom in this situation.
Clearly Melissa exhibits many of the traits of a
sociopath such as failing to recognize the rights of others, a grandiose sense
of self, lacking the sense of personal boundaries, and is indifferent to the
devastation she caused. She is not concerned about wrecking others' lives and
dreams and she certainly does not accept any personal blame rather she blames
others, even for acts she obviously committed.
